EUPHORIA (Season 1 – Episode 1)

Just a reminder before tonight’s premiere, that Euphora is for mature audiences. It’s a raw and honest portrayal of addiction, anxiety and the difficulties of navigating life today. There are scenes that are graphic, hard to watch and can be triggering. Please only watch if you feel you can handle it. Do what’s best for you. I will still love you and feel your support.

Love, Daya.

Zendaya wrote this and posted it hours and hours before the series premiere of Euphoria. It is an American Teen drama created by Sam Levinson. The series is an adaption of an israeli version with the same name which was under the creation of Ron Leshem, Daphna Levin and Tmira Yardeni. The series follows the lives of modern high school students in 2019 as they go through the trials of drug usage, sexual contact, understanding their own identity, trauma, social media, love and the ever complicating realms of friendship.

Seeing the trailers and looking at the teaser photos posted around social media, it really wasn’t going to be an HBO based version of “13 reasons why”. It felt raw, real, it felt a lot more like a young adult vibe rather instead of teen because from start to finish, way deep down inside it just hits home as a young adult.

And then it happens…our story begins with our main protagonist Rue in the form of a voice over. The voice over aids in a short document of her growing up to her modern day aged self. From her traveling days in her mother’s belly, happy and at peace with the space she is given. As she explains herself. But all of that was scraped as she was welcomed on to this earth; the actual day of her birth taking place three exact days after 9/11. Fast forward she is a healthy child in the suburbs living in the middle class section of the economy. That is until she starts counting the square frames of the light fixture over her family’s kitchen table. Her mother asks her repeatedly as to what she is doing since this doesn’t seem very normal to her. What happens next, it’s as if someone took a toy away from her; she starts to cry. We are then in a therapist’s office and there may absolutely more to Rue than meets the eye. She is diagnosed with obsessive compulsive disorder, attention deficit disorder, general anxiety disorder, and in the therapist’s words; “…and possibly bipolar disorder. but she’s a little young to tell“. Way to go on the technique of reassurance, very helpful. There have been plenty of others like Rue. Well at least in her mom’s words.

Vincent Van Gogh

Sylvia Plath

and a modern day favorite of Rue….Britney Spears!

I remember that incident a little too well in the footage the show used but enough of that. Through the ages of 8 and 12, life just hit differently for Rue. Most of us wish that time would slow down so we could enjoy every single moment of it. For Rue, it quite a trip within her life span. We are then taken to a scene of where Rue’s health problems come in to play during school. When we are exercising, we are told every single minute that we need to concentrate on our breathing so that way we don’t over do it. But what happens when we are not at a gym environment but a school environment? Well, Rue answers our question after collapsing in class due to focusing on her breathing so much. We then see her experience the pressure of accepting her body and the early days of communication through texting. One bathroom sequence after another and we now see her taking pills from the cabinet that are meant for her mom but it’s a free way for Rue to FEEL SOMETHING. At least, that’s what her philosophy on her life at the moment is like. She didn’t build the system she was in. When she started to physically exist, she didn’t fuck it up either.

And then it happens…life, in a way, is mostly euphoric. Filled with moments of endless 2 seconds of a pattern: Nothingness & freedom.

We finally have caught up to Rue a summer before her junior year of high school. While the sun hit on her neighborhood and everyone went on with their plans, she spent it in rehab. Reason for? I think in time we will find out soon enough. As her mom drives her and her sister home, she spots a girl around her age riding a bike. She had no intention of staying clean and in a flash forward voice over, we are informed the bike rider is a girl named Jules. Who will most likely join Rue and company at school as the new kid. We then meet one of Rue’s friends, Fezco. A known local drug dealer who has a close friendship with Rue. Close enough to be concerned about Rue immediately wanting a drug despite leaving rehab just a few hours ago. Part of me is concerned but at the same time as an outsider from watching the trailers, it’s expected despite everything that she has been through. I think the most surprising from that scene is basically one or maybe the only drug supplier in town being an actual child with a nickname like Ashtray. Honestly when a season 2 is announced. I just wanna learn more about this kid and see his point A, before he became a supplier, to understand his point B, his present life. Not only that, just how does he know so much about drugs in general is also a big question.

We are taken to an inner thought in Rue’s mind. She is in a colorful like pattern tent with Jules. Could be a flash forward scene but only time will tell.

“What’s wrong?”

“I’m so happy.”

Cut to Rue’s introduction of Nate. Looking like the typical popular guy from the same school Rue and Jules go to. Nate apparently has caused bullshit with Jules and Rue. Only time will tell how deep that goes. He once fingered Rue on the dance floor without her consent and that alone should say he has a LOT of growing up to do. With a little sexual harassment, in this case catcalling, towards Jules while both are handling means of transportation, this season one might be a build up with Nate but we shall see.

Next up is Jules’ introduction. She and her father moved to the suburbs after her mom divorced her father. Like most who go through that process, she never really brings it up which is reasonable. She has taken up online dating and instead of going to a party with her friend Kat who has known Jules for awhile and we will meet in full later, she has agreed to meet a guy called ‘DominantDaddy‘ for a hookup. Kat receives Jules’ text while pep talking Maddy before Mckay’s party while simultaneously speaking to a another girl called BB. All the while going into debate that while Maddy needs to get over Nate, Kat needs to lose her virginity. Catfishing won’t aid in her situation so let’s just see how this plays out.

Rue arrives home much to the worry of her mom and her sister since they have every right to be regardless of being home for 5 days. Rue is on drugs and she needs a way to beat her mom’s emergency drug test.

1. the obvious pre-choice: stop taking drugs

2. Option one: niacin (the biggest side effect of this is death so that’s no)

3. Option two: synthetic urine (that is if you can pay for the high price of it)

4. Option three: get a friend who doesn’t do drugs to pee for you

Rue chooses option three by sneaking out to ask her friend Lexi to pee for her. Regardless of not being the best of friends as they did while growing up, Lexi still aids Rue. She’s been back for 5 days and madness has already occurred. She heads back to her house and tapes a bottle of nose drops, containing Lexi’s urine, to her leg. While her mom is back is turned and Rue is “peeing”, we are given the recount of the day that Rue almost overdosed at the beginning of summer. A frightening recount, it was Rue’s little sister Gia who had found her unconscious, lightly gasping for air and close to suffering from a complete overdose. It hurts my heart to see her witness that. Yet, with the real tone of this show, it’s what we have all faced with our loved ones. A public example would be Demi Lovato almost dying from a fatal overdose after ending her sobriety months prior. We steer away from serious topic along with others but that’s another blog post on it’s own that can be created. Back to the story…

Out of everyone that wants to see Rue succeed in this life, the obvious choice would always be her family. Drugs are fun to take for awhile but once you start taking them as if they were apart of your 3 meals a day, you can lose two things: everything or yourself. Rue almost lost herself, a family’s worst fear. With the help of Lexi’s urine, Rue passes her drug test. We are shifted back to Jules and she injected estrogen hormones into her now bruised thigh. Which gives off the reveal that she is a transgender female. We’ll probably get more info into her transition but who knows. We then are accompanied by the mellow electric sounds of a possible new Labrinth track as we see Ms. Jules travel on her bike to a motel. As we all can piece together, this is were she and her online hookup agreed to meet. Let’s just hope this dude isn’t a catfish and this scene doesn’t perform a 180.

We then are brought back to the…classy tone of a male that is Nate. Calling a female we have yet to meet, Cassie, a..whore. Mckay, Nate’s friend, tries to speak up for Cassie in her absence and say that she isn’t. Smart, funny, pretty and she likes vehicles; that’s the Cassie, Mckay knows. Nate wants to attempt to change that, keyword: attempt.

Here’s the fucking thing that pisses me off about the world. Like, every time someone’s shit gets leaked, whether it’s J. Law or Leslie Jones, the whole world’s like, “Well if you don’t want it out there, don’t take the nudes in the first place.” I’m sorry. I know your generation relied on flowers and fathers’ permission, but it’s 2019, and unless you’re Amish, nudes are the currency of love, so stop shaming us. Shame the assholes who create password-protected online directories of naked, underage girls. 

Cassie is known by most as all of those things that Mckay said and with Rue also giving her two cents in her voiceover. All the while we are given a quick flashback to the in house scene of while waiting for Lexi’s urine, Rue can be seen talking to Lexi’s mom…and Cassie. It turns out that Mckay is the boyfriend of Cassie and this scene is all the more disappointing with Nate’s character as he tries to change Mckay’s view on his current love.

As expected with high school rumor mill, Nate got in Mckay’s head:

1. He told Cassie 

2. Cassie told Lexi

3. Lexi told Rue

We cut to Mckay’s party and Cassie and Mckay are chilling on a spiral staircase. You can tell Mckay is still thinking about what Nate showed him. With that on his mind, after giving her compliments, he hooks up with her. Well the first attempt, he tries to envision what Nate experienced, meaning he tried being rough with her. Rue informs us that Mckay and Cassie’s time in that bed will not end with a rape to her by him. Real life sex doesn’t have to be like a porno. Not everyone likes being choked, spanked etc. That’s why not all porn is like that too. Cassie is understandably hurt by Mckay’s actions and he understands fully that she is not into that kind of stuff. The turn of event is however, unless he asks her first or she asks him first to choke her. They kiss and the view ends with calm consent.

We head back to Rue and she is headed to Mckay’s party where she is walking on foot and intoxicated. Why on foot?

via GIPHY

and this is why I love the Internet sometimes. Like you just can’t really help but shake your head and laugh. Rue hitches a ride with Maddy, BB and Kat in order to not end up in a bush.

We cut back to Jules and of course my bad gut turns out to always be right. DominantDaddy turns out to be and old guy who, might also be married, that just wants to get his rocks hard in the wrong places due to Jules and her two ages. He’s envious about the current generation. Claiming young people don’t care as much about the rules. He’s basically been living out his life in motel rooms so in a way that’s a disturbing foreshadowing when you try to think about it even if you don’t want to.

Jules once told me that every night when she was a kid, like, five or something…she’d lock herself in the bathroom, get down on her hands and knees, and…pray to god. She’d pray that when she woke up in the morning, she’d be 25 years old. She’d live with her best friend, a girl. Someone she hadn’t met yet, but…someone she knew she’d trust forever. I don’t know why, but when she told me that story, I started to cry so hard I hyperventilated. Jules just kept laughing and saying, “What’s wrong?” But…I didn’t know.

We cut back to the party once more and after taking a drug, Jules is on a TRIP.

via GIPHY

Whatever occurred during the party is basically filled in by everyone else since Jules isn’t always in the right mind to tell the story. Maddy and Nate were on the rebound side of the night as they each found someone in order to make the other jealous. Maddy is obviously succeeding as she ends up having sex in the pool in front of everyone with her rebound.

via GIPHY

Meanwhile Kat, tries to make herself look cool in front of the twins and a random party goer. She lies and claims she’s had sex dozens of times but the guy sitting in front of her, Wes, knows she is just in real life stuntin just to look cool. She was a virgin and a week into summer school after Kat told Jules this information, even Jules had the same reaction as BB and Maddy. Kat just really needed to catch some dick. Then of course the topic is brought up differently. Apparently, only sluts and males watch porn. Everybody watches porn at some point in their lives. Wes dares Kat and tries to further her out of her comfort zone by getting her to take her top off. Does this lead to her virginity being taken? We’ll never know.

Rue is shown talking to Fezco. Aside from owing him $120 for the drugs, he tries to level with her. With her incident, it obviously scared the shit out of him. He likes Rue and he doesn’t want her life to end with drugs in her system. He’s seen a lot of past good people of his walk out of their bodies due to excessive drug usage. His message to Rue is despite using them himself, drugs aren’t the answer. She then tells him a story:

You know, I remember when I was eleven years old…It was a couple of months before my dad got diagnosed,and we got the results back from the prognosis. And it was really good. It was like, 80/20. And we decided to celebrate, so…we like ordered a bunch of Chinese food. I remember that night, I was laying between my parents in bed, and, uh…all of a sudden I couldn’t breathe. It was like there was no more air left in the world. And I was gasping, and I was panicking. And they called the ambulance and they thought it was like…an allergic reaction or some shit. And then when I got to the hospital, they gave me liquid Valium. Yeah. To calm me down. And when it hit me, I thought…This is it. This is the feeling I have been searching for my entire life, for as long as I can remember. Because suddenly, the world went quiet. And I felt safe, in my own head. Two years later, he was gone. Panic attacks stayed. And I found a way to live, so…Will it eventually kill me? Maybe. Fuck, maybe not. I don’t know.

That ladies and gentlemen is why Rue is one ”fucking trip, bruh”. This conversation is crazy but things only get crazier.

Jules arrives at the party and so far no one notices. Nate is then informed about an update with his ex Maddy in the pool with a rebound. At this point she is having full on sex in the pool in front of everyone and Nate calls her a whore while walking away ticked off. Then he heads to he kitchen and he starts going insane on a drunken rage. Breaking glasses and telling everyone to exit the kitchen. He then spots Jules and asks her who she is and why is she even at the party. He continues to get in her face and even threatens to harm her. Like any female feeling harmed, she finds a way to fight back. She grabs a nearby knife and yells at Nate continuing to claim she was just at the party to chill. She even cuts herself to show Nate that she is ready to throwdown if he kept his shenanigans up. She quickly intoduces herself to those surrounding the kitchen and proceeds to try and exit the party. We see BB and Kat at another section of the party and she admits that she finally lost my virginity. Much to the pure delight of BB.

We are then cut to a scene that is just between Jules and Rue. They have finally met each other. Rue tags along with Jules and spends the rest of the night at her place. Minus the bloody arm, it’s basically what you would expect. We then cut to Mckay and Cassie sleeping together. Maddy, BB and Kat are in their individual sleeping spaces in Maddy’s room. We cut to Nate returning home and apparently he is the son of DominantDaddy. Things are absolutely getting weird. As for Rue laying in bed with Jules and deciding to get high with her, it’s only weird if she makes it weird.

#EUPHORIA #HBO #Review #TV